I've done my part.

"Love will remain a mystery, but give me your hand and you'll see."

Good morning my loyal readers, bet I don't really HAVE one. Hah. Mostly I post is absolute empty state of mind of a growing teenager who just ended her schooling days in the last two days. Don't get me wrong, the quoted words have absolutely nothing to do with what I'm gonna post, well more or less it will. See where will my mind and my fingers drive me to. Not really in good terms with maps. So hmmm, oh its only 9 in the morning, and guess what time did I wake up? 6.30am. Brilliant. Never was really fond of waking up later in the morning, think it wouldn't do good. So anyway, all I had for breakfast was banana and a mug of coffee. Coffee is a must everyday, makes me feel old. So anyway caffeine isn't really good for your body apparently. So what the heck? So much for a healthy diet. I might as well shove a dozen of Quarter Pounder in my tiny mouth. Man, I'll be all bloated up. From 41 kilograms to hmmm well, 75? Holy F. Think I'll pass. So when I don't know what the hell woke me up at 3 in the morning, I came up with one conclusion;

Yes BIOLOGY 2 IS HARD,

BUT

They (The smart asses) WILL get A - NO DOUBT;

I on the other hand, WILL NOT.

All hail to my ever confirmed B or C. Holy SHIT.

With that, I rest my case. =/ And with that, I have ABSOLUTE no confidence to get A for my science subjects; Additional Mathematics, Physics, Chemistry, not to mention biology. So lets just wait 4 months ahead. And see what the hell did I do with my papers. I mean, ok I think I can get A for at least AMath or Physics or Chemistry, but ADOI! InsyaAllah lah ok. Just pray hard for me. That was pretty much what I think about this morning when the house was sleeping and after I went to the loo to do my business. And right there you are, I slept again til 6.30 am. Ok this shows I have absolutely nothing to talk about or rather write than to fill you with my early hours of the day. Shut up; its my BLOG, and you're READING it, if you do not like it, feel free to page skip. I'm glad you stopped by. Great effort. So anyway, in connection with the quoted line up up above, again I might say it might be the end or might be the new beginning for some of us who just ended high school - the crafting industry, I would like to say, that our parents had put such love, such tendency, such support, effort and anger to raise her up til 17. And the least we could do for them is appreciate their hard work in raising a kid and do great for our future. Which parents wouldn't want to see their kid work all grown up, secured future, secured life so they would be at ease, at peace not needing to worry about their kids anymore. We on the other should worry about them, worry on how little love we've shown them. Because particularly all we do is shout at them and raise voices and postponing our house chores. And well, always complaining on what's on the table. Lets face it, you haven't been out in the real world but they have. They have put way so much effort to make a living and put food on your table, to nourish their kids' good souls. And the least they could do is GETTING HIGH ON DRUGS? DRINK ALCOHOL AND DRIVE? PARTY TIL DAWN AND SLEEP AROUND NOT WORRYING ABOUT GOD OR STD AT LEAST? NOT. Don't mind me, I probably should mind my own business and all, but honey, the world's not always rainbows, time's not always gonna wait for you. Stand up on your feet and get groomed! Its time to shine and MAKE YOUR PARENTS PROUD.

I'm pretty sure behind their hearts even they said they're OK with it they're worrying about you. And the least you could do is make them happy and well do them good you know. After all they have done for you. No matter how screwed up your family tale could be, they're still family, and there isn't a reason to start solving your problems with negative influences. Waste of time, cash, and life. Life's way ahead, start worrying where you'll end up. And I swear you can do it, even if you do not have the greatest of results or the best charismatic skills or the finest hairdo. Its all in the mind darling. Buckle up, get groomed and LIVE.

And I think that is all for now, I've been filling empty time slots with the PC too much. Getting back to my old habits since studying is much of a last choice to do right now. So, cheers. Get yourself a paper from the hawker stall and read about the world, see how much suffering they're going through, and do they choose your way of solving it? I guess not, there's no short cut to life. Then, grab yourself a daisy from the florist.

"Life's too short for craps."

Raining Tuesday, it makes you think.

Right where I left from, it was raining, but it has stopped. Anyway, since it was raining, I went to my room, and ready to indulge through Robinson Crusoe. Hah. Guess how far it goes? 12 pages! ;D Long way to go! Only because the electricity went off. It didn't stop there, no I didn't freak the hell out of myself. Boo. I'm not a bloody coward. Its just dark, its raining with thunders and its 1900hours. oh man, who cares? I'm 17 not 7. Its just dark, and the kids downstairs were already freaking out. I guess that happens when you're still at your childhood age. Man I miss being a kid. But whatever, I still think I am one. ;D So then I grabbed a torch light next to my bedside table and started reading the book, ridiculously with a low source of light. Not exactly a good thing for the eyes. But whatever, never really did care about them. Ok, don't get me wrong. So anyway, the kids climbed up the stairs, and knocked on the door.

"Kakak, pinjam torch light ok?"

And since I'm a good kakak, I lend it to them, leaving myself in a bore state in the dark listening to the pouring rain outside. Heck, at least I did good to them kids. And so, I lay on the bed listening to the rain, staring at the awfully dark ceiling and apparently I see nothing. And logically its because its dark. Duh. Well, all i thought about was what's going to happen next? Like ten years down the road. Will I be what I expected to be? I guess that's pretty much everyone's question of life. What's next what's next? Lets just wait and see. And I thought about this blog too, how far would it go? I mean I've been posting and posting, that's because its new. But what happened after days, weeks or months? When I pretty much ran out of things to say. I really fancy writing and all, but you know the harder you try to make it turn out good, the harder it gets. You can never just let it flow, let all good things flow, and fling your masterpiece up and be proud of it. It only comes once in a while like when I write english compositions for my exams. The paper I always look forward to. I guess its because it makes me talk to my thoughts or rather conscience. Like what should happen next? Or laughing at my story etc etc. Like once I was suppose to write about the worst thing that happened to me. And so well, I let my imagination create its experimental fiction. And I pretty much fancied it. Its not the typical, I lost my wallet and got banged on that bloody lamp-post kinda thing. This woman was suppose to get married that day. She woke up to a house with screaming nannies and psychotic sisters and wickedly loud nieces and nephews. So the sisters were drunk right. From you know the hen party last night and all, then her cell vibrated, it was her fiance and all, and they exchanged expectations on the their big day. And thats when she heard her adik screamed. Haha. Then she found her adik's bridesmaid's dress filled with doodles by her nieces who apparently were testing their new Crayolas that their father bought for them. Poor her. So anyway, then her bestfriend called her, telling her that the stripper they hired last night for the hen party stole the wedding ring for her fiance. Boy, wasn't she furious? She particulary shouted on the phone and slammed it. Then her dad dashing through the hallway, screaming and all she heard was the weird Sims language that her fiance always plays on his notebook. Hah. No, her dad was telling her that the caterer is bailing off. Her demands were too high; pork chops with extra pepper and garlic, fries fried with sunflower oil. What? she wants it to be perfect, IT IS her wedding day, and this is MY story. So just read ok? And, she could have fainted right that instance. But no she didn't, where's the fun in there? So she took her car keys, crossed across the green lawns, so much for the grass is greener on the other side. And sat in the car with Cyndi Lauper bursting on the stereo and drove to the best doctor in the whole world. So she stood in front of the door there at the porch, and cried like a small girl wanting a balloon from the carnival. She told him everything that happened, and all he said was ; " Honey, your family is psychotic, don't you think they wouldn't pull a prank on our wedding day, it is after all, april fool."

So I've enlighten you with that. I bet you skipped a few lines. Because its long winded. Hah. Anyway I aced that paper. All is well. And, however I hope I did well for SPM. =/ So I watched this anime called Emma on 75; astro. This dude was running next to the train for his love. A typical scene. But it made me wonder is there anybody would do such crazy thing? I mean, why is love so special? I had that once. Now years after, I laughed at myself for being the way I was. I mean c'mon. Its the real world, I'm all grown up right now, mentally, physically (maybe not) and emotionally. F bizzare. Hah. I was a kid once, been there done that. Trust me, if you're madly in love now in your teenage years, it wouldn't last long honey I'm afraid. True love doesn't exist now in this globalisation days. Snap up! Don't get me wrong. And I wonder, how many boys and girls are in love with the person next door? You know; the whole the-boy-next-door or the-girl-next-door kinda thing? Its really sweet and all, but its only in the movies. So yah, whatever. The rain made me really emotional, snap out of it man!

So, its already 2116hours, and I've two good classic movies in line waiting for me in front, better go and watch them, I've to returned them on Thursday anyway. So, I hoped I've filled your empty seconds well and I'm pretty sure you skipped quite a number of lines. Well, that's ok, I do that too when it gets draggy. No one's perfect. Where's the fun in there?

" Maybe you're the same as me, we see things they'll never see, you and I are going to live forever."

Here's to the raining night.

Selamat petang Tuan-Tuan dan Puan-Puan,
Saya berbesar hati untuk menghiburkan hati anda dgn kisah satu hari selepas SPM saya.

My eyes hurt, my nose was RED. And ah-ha, the dust couldn't find any better place to be than my nostrils and my eyes. TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT. No stop your thoughts right there, my house is not hopelessly messy or dirty, i was cleaning my books. Well, getting rid of them its a proper term. Not exactly though, i boxed them up. Chose my thick, torn, overused reference books and arranged them on the shelves, right where they belonged before my study days. So anyway, I'm just keeping them for you know, future reference. You never know when they might come in handy. So yah, secretly kinda sad to get rid of them, its good in its condition, all torn and over used, and the doggy ears pages, yeah i like them like that. So anyways, after all that boxed up books, I went through my exercise books, and tore off the used pages and to keep the remaining ones, and well guess what? I only did my Additional Mathematics, History and Physics homework. Well at least I did right? Better than nothing. Anyways, I just hope I won't screw my results up. Not expecting much on Biology though. Sorry, I just never fancy biology. Then i gathered up all the used papers, and getting ready to recycle them. HERE'S TO HELP THE LIVING EARTH. Don't get me wrong, I'm all hyped up to help the earth and all that good stuffs, but er, I can have fun too. Whatever that's suppose to mean, take it anyway you like.

So then I wanted to start reading my Robinson Crusoe but sadly it got nowhere. Read it til the third page, then i felt my eyes were aching, and then, I wanted to sleep. But to no avail. So I flipped through the girly magazine, ha. Funny how people said that they promote low self esteem, well then you just don't have good control of your life honey, I'm sorry. Then tried to sleep again, then, FORGET ABOUT IT. Ran down the stairs, to check my download progress, and yeh score! Strike'em Giddy! Done done done! 5 more episodes to go. Boo. So anyway, I'll crap and enlighten you more with this absolute empty state of mind later, its raining cats and dogs. I might as well get my yellow raincoat on and stand in the rain. And watch paper boats swim down the drain. Cheers.

Here's to the raining night.

Throw your bags and burn your books? Not.

I'm tired. You may say; it was a long long day. Sat for my Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia LAST paper. Oh yes; JOY. Not. Paper two was HARD, HARD, HARD. Anyway, this is what a typical blogger would write. Oh no, I'm not a plain Jane. Anyway, as people see it, its a day to "burn your books". Darlings, you'd only contribute destruction to the earth. After PAPERS of essays, can't you still get the message they're trying to send to you? Its not all about trying to ace them, its not about trying to fry your brains over tons of books and knowledge. You're suppose to apply them in life and well, help the living earth! Anyway, by burning books, you'd contribute to haze etc. And unfortunately to ozone depletion too. SO STOP COMPLAINING WHEN THE SUN'S TOO HOT or "MY MAKE-UP IS RUIN" or "GOD I'M FRIGGIN HOT." GOD. YOU MADE THE MESS! Think, think! Ok, I'm way over the top. You may shoot me now.

So anyway, after the third paper of the day, which by the way, was the last one of the day, I didn't really feel excited when they were collecting the papers, yeah. It was the last to school uniform, it was the last to be walking out of the school gate, it would be the last to be in the hall as a student, it was the last hearing Pn.Chong talking on the mic. Etc etc and the list goes on and on! "All good things MUST come to an END." That's life unfortunately. I'm going to miss every single soul in school. Every single ABIOSIS. (Man, I'm trying hard to make it sound NOT cheesy, the harder I try, the CHEESIER it gets. Oh well, must me my sleepy eyes.) And I know how people hate draggy posts, and you'll probably end up skipping lines and oh what do you know? You missed up the whole page, *click*

Cheers to all.

Finish up your drink.

Never ask someone for support.
You'll get too dependent on ppl.
Then you'll end up falling. Falling.
Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow.
But SOMEDAY.
So, CHEMISTRY paper didn't really turn out what WE all expected.
Good thing? Or bad? You decide.
So we all headed for the big gate - the school's magazine was waiting for us.
I mean, its like the second last day of school.
YES IT IS. After ELEVEN YEARS of studying, its finally coming to an end.

" Well, all good things must come to an end."


But i never thought it would this fast.
OK my eyes just hurt right now.
Really it does. Er.
So what comes after this? Is it an end? Or a new beginning?
We've all make eleven years of education, a memorable one.
You may say I sound ridiculous because its just high school and all.
But whatever. I love school. And I'm DEFINITELY going to miss school
So its the place where you seek your inner self.
The one full of make-up or the one that's willing to dive into the dumpster.
Haha. Anyway, its a playground of mind.
Its a crafting industry, yes it is.
You mould yourself for you future here.
A funny place to be though,
Here, you learn that people come and go,
You'll learn that its EASIER when you actually STUDIED. ;)
That life's NOT all about rebelling.
That ADULTS are TRYING to hold a better future for you.
So, take a deep look, and breath deep,
Open your eyes that it is not always ice-creams and cakes.
Well it WON'T be. Even if you're Paris Hilton.
Because that's life. Every phase you face,
You'll learn that even the best falls.
So, swallow up, and order another round!