Thy beliefs.

Back when Laser Discs were part of the luxurious life, I had the opportunity to enjoy my Disney Princesses and Mary Poppins with them. Not forgetting Batman, Star Wars and Jurassic Park. My papa surely did provide them for me.

But there were certain LDs that were off boundaries namely Original Sin, where my fellow growing guy cousins were so hyped out about. They were growing teenagers, mind you. But there was this LDs that caught my eye. Simply because the box was so intense. Nah, nothing physically obscene as Original Sin though.

I do not know what's it called, but the illustration of the box was this beardy man, holding a cross up high to the sky. And the whole box was in red. I knew I had to watch this movie.

Being five, I wasn't allowed to. I asked why? The answer fall between the realms of Jesus, God, and not suitable for kids your age. Well, just yet. I guess they were afraid I would turn my baby faith towards God.

Last night on television, I came across this advertisment of an Indonesian sinetron. Mind you, it is not your average Bawang Merah, Bawang Putih sinetron. It is actually about questioning faith. Questioning, provoking, challenging your faith. Namely Islam.

I told Mama, they have such guts to make such sinetron! I think she took it wrongly and said, 'Indonesians kan?; Whatever that is supposed to mean. I meant, they were very brave. The ad showed excerpts of the drama, a man praying in a telekung at the woman's section. He got chased out of the masjid, and he had this heaty argument with the Pak Imam, pointing shouting at the sky. And I'm surprised it is not banned knowing our censorship board. Probably under, 'having the potential to menyesatkan fellow Muslims'?

Nah. I think it is good really. It helps them to think more. It helps us to realize about Mazhabs, and what are they really? Follow the norms that are preached or follow the sole teachings without any Mazhabs in tact?

I once asked my friend, 'what if at the end of the day, a man rises from the crowd and claims that he is the savior. He is the messiah. He is the messenger. He reasons out God, which ironically God can't be reasoned out.?' What would happen?

I don't know. You tell me. Did Papa make the right move to not let me watch that LD back when I was five? What if I had watched it, I'm sure I would enjoy it. Although I would be too young to understand deeply, but at least it would not leave me wondering 14 years down the road, 'how is that movie like, really?'.

It's funny isn't it? We're finding elements that would help us define our religious faith? It's not that I'm questioning my faith or anything, it's just that, you know, you would want to strengthen it, and wonder deeply. Why this, and not that? I want that bloody movie damnit.